Sunday, April 27, 2014

A Travis Memory: For Roo on her Birthday

Today, my Roo turns 8 years old.
We had a fun week and have really celebrated her...
but let's be honest, 
all birthdays will be tough,
but 8.
8 is extremely hard for her.

8 is the age most Mormon kids choose to be baptized,
and most of them are lucky enough to have their Daddy do it for them.

When we met the Dr. and had the impossible discussion of being option less,
and running out of time,
the first thing we talked about afterwards was Sienna's baptism.
Travis just wanted to make it this long.
He was heartbroken for Sienna,
and we have felt the void pretty heavily.

So for Sienna, for her last b-day gift,
a Travis memory.
When Roo was 3 years old,
we were rushing to get ready for church.
I was in charge of sharing time that day,
and as always, we were running late.
Sienna was fevered,
and as we were getting ready,
she was getting pretty fussy,
and using the potty an awful lot....
we thought she probably had a UTI.

Travis took her to instacare while I got Adyson ready.

Just as we were getting ready to leave for church,
Travis texted me that they were sending Roo in an ambulance to the ER
and they told him she had diabetes.

Just like that...
they said her levels looked so bad that she needed to be rushed to the ER right away.

I called my mom instantly and she came to get Adyson
and I rushed in to the ER.

I will never forget seeing my sweet girl,
head full of curls,
pale face,
hooked up to an iv and monitors,
laying on her pillow in her hospital gown.

Travis was holding her hand and singing to her
and trying to keep her happy.
I ran to her other side and snuggled up to her to hold her hand,
and she gave me some of her attention,
and as soon as her eyes were on me,
Travis couldn't hold in the tears.

I will never forget watching him try to be strong for her,
and hide his worry-but he was heartbroken for her.

He was well into his treatments at the time and knew exactly how awful
it was to have a disease that can consume you.
The thought of Sienna having something so hard to face just did him in.

Sienna can't remember this.
She can't remember quite a few things from when Travis was healthy,
but I hope she can always remember that he loved her more then words can express,
and if she was happy, 
he felt about a million times better.

The ER doctors that day learned pretty quickly that instacare read
her results wrong,
and after lots of tests throughout the week,
decided she was just fine. (That's a whole different post)

The next Sunday Roo was back to following 
Travis around during sacrament meeting as he counted heads for his clerk calling.
(That's another memory I just treasure-Roo making him carry her as he roamed the room.)

a memory that shows the type of father Trav was.
He was selfless and loving and his girls always came first.
And we miss him!
I just can't begin to express how much...

Happy Birthday Roo.
Your Dad sure loves you still.

1 comment:

Matt Payne said...

so sweet. Sienna is just adorable.